It is true that not everyone will love or like you no matter what you do or who you are, but the following steps can in many ways help dictate the way people look at you, making your personality to command respect even before you come close.

1. Always treat others how you want to be treated.

This means being kind to everybody. Do you like being insulted? Of course you don’t! So don’t insult others! When you’re put into a difficult situation, ask yourself “How would I feel if someone did this to me?” before doing or saying anything. If you treat others the way you want to be treated, they’ll treat you the same way, and they’ll respect you.

2. Help others.

This means talking to that shy new girl. Or hanging out with that lonely person. Or helping other people with their troubles. Give helpful advice to others and help them with homework or tasks that they need to accomplish. Don’t be self-centered, and always help that person in need. They will remember that, and as a result, they will love and appreciate you for being caring.

3. Be social.

Make conversations with new people. The more people, the better. Don’t restrict yourself to the same 3 or 4 friends. Branch out to new people, or even old acquaintances that you haven’t spoken to in a long time. Talk to them and be nice to them. You never know what you might discover about them. Maybe you had more in common with them than you thought! Besides, if you don’t talk to people, they won’t love you, will they?

4. Listen to others.

The more people like, trust, and love you, the more often they will come to you seeking help with their problems. When this happens, listen to them. Don’t blow them off and say something like “I don’t have time right now,” or “I don’t really care.” Listen patiently to their story, and then talk it out with them. Sometimes people just want to vent, and they’ll come to you to do so. If you’re able to listen to their problems, they’ll love you even more.

5. Compliment others.

If you noticed that the girl sitting across from you got a new haircut, compliment her on it! It will make her feel good, and in return, you’ll feel good. Karma comes around, and if you’re nice to people, they’ll be nice to you back! Once you start complimenting people, you’ll more than likely get a few compliments back, and other people will love you!

6. Love others!

Before getting other people to love you, you need to love them! You can’t expect a person that you don’t love and care about to love you back. You need to love each and every person (or at least care about them) before they can love you.

7. Be as positive as possible.

Nobody wants to be around someone who’s grouchy and mean all day! Stay positive and release good vibes! If you have had a bad day, learn to let go of those bad vibes, and don’t let your mood affect the way you talk to other people. Nobody likes a grumpy person.

8. Be yourself.

Nobody likes a fake person. Don’t change yourself to fit other people, and don’t try to be a people pleaser either. Be fair and non judgmental of others. Embrace who you are, and different people around you. Whether you are talking to a popular person or that shy girl, treat everybody equally.

9. Love yourself first!

As mentioned previously, you need to love yourself. Write down all the good qualities about yourself, and strive to correct those qualities you don’t like. Learn how to be confident, as this is a crucial step in making other people love you. Embrace who you really are, even your flaws. Nobody’s perfect, but as long as you love who you are, you don’t need to be perfect!

Try these nine simple steps above and like a magician, you will be amazed at how many, will not be able to resist your personality.