Many of us were glued to our television sets recently watching the Queen’s funeral. We all have our different thoughts on colonisation and what it has wrought for us, but I choose to veer away from that never-ending debate. I will instead comment on the Queen’s funeral ceremony and an abiding event during the Queen’s visit to Sierra Leone that has stuck with me to this day. To this day I remember how Teacher T did not get to meet the Queen! Back to that later.

Let me first mention a few positive things that struck me about the British and their institutions and how these impacted on the Queen’s funeral. Love them or hate them, you have to admire their ability to put up a show. The pageantry was exquisite and they showed respect for their time honoured customs-quite unlike us who throw away ours at every opportunity in our quest for “modernity” which we never achieve in any case. Even those who are not monarchists would be impressed.

As an Anglican Churchman, I was impressed by the fact that they could pack all the essentials into a one-hour service-exactly one hour-no more no less. Nevertheless, despite its brevity and simplicity, the service a was regal.

The Archbishop of Canterbury’s seven-minute sermon was appropriate, meaningful and impactful. The choir showed they were well rehearsed and the readers read with aplomb. For such an important event, a typical Sierra Leonean Church would have had the Pastor preach for 45 minutes, wading through the life history of the deceased and dance on the stage or pulpit in theatrics. An unprepared reader would have announced- “Our old testament reading is taken from the gospel of Luke”, and when finished reading, after saying “this is the word of God”, we would all acclaim-“thanks be to God”, not necessarily because that is the response but because we are glad to see him finish. Various organisations would have fallen over each other to deliver long tributes.

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But let me get back to Teacher T-I just have to tell you this story! When the Queen visited Sierra Leone at the end of 1961, I was a small boy aspiring to be a Cub as I was so impressed with the District Scoutmaster, Teacher T (I was a classmate of one of his children and so would not use his real name -I hope he does not read this!), who was an Inspector of schools. He was a diminutive man with a slightly slouched back, but a larger than life character. He personified Lord Baden -Powell, the founder of the world scouting movement and we would fondly call him “Kenema Baden-Powell”. He had dutifully prepared the scouts in all the schools for the Queen’s visit. He went from school to school, often sweating profusely and barking out instructions to his troops on how to behave in the presence of the Queen. The long expected day arrived when the Queen would visit Kenema. Unfortunately, Teacher T collapsed from exhaustion in the morning and was taken to the Kenema Government hospital and could not meet the Queen. Plans to take Teacher T to Freetown to at least set eyes on the Queen fell through and so Teacher T never met the Queen! He was the butt of unfair jokes in Kenema for a long time-which even got extended to his kids. Colleagues would often tell them- “Bo lef we ya, you Papa nor see Queen pan all d gaya gaya.”

Oh, I nearly forgot about the diamond Sir Milton Margai presented to the Queen as a present. I saw from the picture-it sparkled and was quite a big stone. I have however not been able to get information on the weight and the price. But the question has always lingered in my mind as to why he should present her with a diamond which could have probably fetched us a considerable amount of money. What were we trying to prove? Why not just give her something cultural like a “Nomoli” or the face mask of a “Goboi” or “Sowei”. Anyway they must have thought through this. I rather like the comments by someone who commented on a picture of Sir Milton dancing with the Queen with the caption-“Luk Milton-Di only man way gi waite woman diamond for dance with am!”. I will however refrain from making such disparaging remarks about our revered Independence leader.

SORIE KONDIE RISES FROM THE DEAD

In case you haven’t noticed, the Leone is in free fall and the Bank Governor, under intense pressure has admitted he can do nothing about it. He has apologised to the people of Sierra Leone because he says he is in a situation where he knows we are all hurting but he does not have the capacity to get rid of that hurt. Whilst sympathising with his predicament, one does not however understand the razzmatazz around the new currency. Redenominating the currency, setting a deadline for changing over to new notes but not having enough new notes to change the old ones looks like poor planning. Extending the deadline for changing over by several months for no apparent reason seems even more baffling.

Just when I thought there must be a method to this madness, Sorie Kondie rises from the dead. Well, most of you by now must have heard of Sorie Kondie the musician whose death was grossly exaggerated. Apparently the Bank of Sierra Leone in its wisdom decided to honour our musical culture by putting the face of a famous dead musician on the new coin. There was only one small problem-the model chosen, Sorie Kondie was very much alive and now he is asking to be compensated. Someone remarked- “Good for you, Sorie. Get a good lawyer, Sorie and take them to the cleaners”. Someone else remarked – “If the BSL can make such a fumble, what else awaits us?

Actually to be fair to BSL, even I had made that kind of mistake before. Somebody I heard was dead suddenly appeared to me at Rokel Commercial Bank. I was in one line in the queue when I saw him in an adjacent queue waiting to collect money (I thought probably to take to heaven). I was scared stiff and decided not to make eye contact but watch him from the corner of my eye, just in case he disappeared into thin air. Unfortunately, or rather fortunately for me, he called my name out. Luckily, after I shook his hand, there was no “ascension”. I am certain however that Sorie Kondie in his present financial predicament, made worse by the Bank as he mentioned on radio would entertain no excuses from the Bank. I hear Sorie is claiming emotional distress and also claims that people’s expectations of him being rich have heightened since they heard he was featured on the national currency. Sorie might even claim he needs to hire personal security personnel to protect him because of his mistaken status as a rich man. Sorie might claim BSL itself could hire a hitman to see him off and prove that he is truly dead, although this is unlikely to help his case. The Bank Governor claims he had good intentions for Sorie and admonishes Sorie to be reasonable with his claims. But how will Sorie Kondie end this saga? Someone bent on mischief has posed the question- “If the BSL’s checking mechanism could not discern whether Sire Kondie was dead or alive, how could they tell whether our Leone is dying or alive and kicking?